Memories of a broken heart 2/29/08
Memories of a broken heart, what used to be a heavy and physically engulfing pain deep with in. Now slowly disapates to a rhythmic throb of soreness. The memory still there, almost like a bruise left behind by a shattering punch to the chest. Yet a soothing wave of calmness leisurely surrounds my entire body. Teasing me with small hopes of better days ahead. I optimisticly await it’s arrival with anticipation. That feeling of freedom and peace, so close to me yet unreachable. So near I can almost feel it take over. I close my eyes and surrender all thoughts of anger and grief. Expectations of that calmness to subdue this broken soul and free it from the grasp of this desolate state in my heart. I embrace the misfortune of teaching my heart to be alone, to love only me. To hold off that need to love anyone else. Force it to entertain the notion of solitude and selfishness. My heart cannot give anymore of itself. It’s not whole, it never has been. It has attached itself to any one heart to fullfill it’s void. In desperate need to be complete. Yet with every unstable failure another piece is broken off, leaving my heart in a decline so steep that the top is now not only further away, but unreachable.
